Are Your Boobs Fake?

This was my Facebook status recently;

HEY WHITE PEOPLE:
Its fine to give a compliment, but WHY would you ask if a little girl’s hair is “real” or “fake”?

Two of my (adoptive mothers of black girls) friends “shared” this. Here are mine, & their, responses:

  • What about if a brown person asks?
  • Amen…
  • First of all Brown people know better .. second they dnt ask if tits r real…lol 
  • No they don’t, not in Florida! My son’s girlfriend complains about the invasive hair questions all the time
  • That only mean it looks too good to be true, doesn’t it? Plus, what does this have to do with race? I’ve asked the same thing about a blonde’s hair color
  • I hear ya, never known a little white girl that was asked if her hair is real or fake and I`m older then the moon ~~
  • Oh my. Why ask anything? Compliment or go away!
  • I was once asked if my daughter has a perm. Yes…. I permed my one year olds hair. Ridiculous.
  • Me:  Black people know what her hair is. When a child is asked DAILY if their hair is “real” it can affect her self-image. Especially if it s a feature which is very different from everyone else. We all know how to use google. I love the “nice boobs, are they real?” comment
  • Me: asking a blonde, who is old enough to color her hair, is different than asking a little girl ifs she is “fake”
  • First of all your little’s girl iS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!! Is she alone when ‘RUDE’ people ask this question or not??? I HOPE SHE IS WITH YOU AND KNOWING YOU, YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO COME UP WITH AN ANSWER THAT WILL BLAST THEM OFF THEIR FEET AND THEN GIVE THEM A BIG SMILE AND WALK AWAY I would like to be there when you do it!!!!! I have even come up with some answerrs in my own mind that I would say to them but that is you choice but make them GOOD!!!!!!!!!!  Let me know what you do do or say, please, and give your little a big hug/ Remember her hair is so awesome that when they first see her they are blown away by how awesome it just is!!!!
  • Me: She gets if with me and on her own. I’m saying something about it so that if people Don’t know, well now they will.
  • Me (to a deleted comment): A compliment is fine. Asking a 4 year old -especially an adult asking- “is that fake hair/is your hair real?” is not okay. Black people know what it is, or how to ask if they are looking for more information. Just about every day that my little girl has extensions in (which she loves) she’s asked if her hair is fake. By white people,children AND adults. There’s quite a difference if you’re asking an autonomous person a non-invasive question.
  • Me: It is a different context when a white person- particularly an adult- is asking. In our culture caucasian is the “default” setting. Whether or not You personally find black women attractive, our culture percieves caucasian as more desirable…black features are not the ideal, black hair needs to be “fixed”. I was told (by an Ethiopian-American woman) that its too bad Addis’ hair is so bad. Usually when it’s a white person commenting/asking they don’t KNOW about extentions. So, this is my Public Service Announcement. If you are about to ask a little black girl if her hair is “real”, go to google. That’s what it is for. Hearing comments DAILY makes a little one question themself…she wants to have Rapunzel’s hair. Let’s face it, it’s not likely to happen. So she gets extentions, & then is questioned continually to explain herself.
  • MeYES, I KNOW I signed up for this.I signed up to have my daughter quesioned “where’s your mom?” “how come your mom is white?” etc all the time. And, because I signed up for it, It is MY JOB to educate those around me. If you didn’t know, as a THREE year old, my daughter was subjected to a racial attack. The world we live in will only include more people unlike yourself, so if what you hear sounds odd, listen to it & see where the other person is coming from.
  • I know what you are talking about. The other thing we have had problems with, even with the boys is people       touching their hair without asking and then making comments. I can’t believe how many times I had to ask adults   “please don’t touch their hair”. The boys are bigger and scarier now but Tauni still has strangers touch her hair without   asking. sheesh people.

Ahairaccessories13

Apparently, several people found it offensive that I said “hey WHITE people”. I wasn’t out to offend people, but if You needed to hear the comment, it was my job to tell you.  This “conversation” occurred about 3 weeks ago, but is still coming up.

 

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About tycobeans
I'm a mom of 3, two bio teens & a little princess from Ethiopia. We have lived all over, but are now settled in Utah. Mostly I'll be sharing about our family life, I hope I have something to say that you enjoy!

3 Responses to Are Your Boobs Fake?

  1. People are strange. Many people don’t have the ‘sense/tact barrier’….. I’d like to think it happens less in Australia, but it don’t.
    People are idiots.
    On the flip, your little one is adorable. Her hair rocks.

    I still don’t know form this if it’s fake or not, but I don’t give a flying!!

  2. Kelley says:

    I’m learning that hair is very important in the black culture. My son’s girlfriend is black, but has a Cuban grandfather and her family constantly comments on how she got the “white” hair. Its brown and kinky and I don’t notice a difference between her and her sisters. And for 6 months I worked with Girls Inc, and after school literacy program for low-income, high-risk girls. 25 of the 30 girls were black, and they all wanted to touch my hair. Even at 6 years old they would make comments on each other’s weaves. Honestly, I would have never imagined putting a weave in a child’s hair, I thought that was only an adult thing. It was an odd situation for this middle aged white woman! Maybe people are making comments just out of ignorance, Be kind and gently educate — truly that’s the best example you can set for your child. However, we’ll always welcome your sarcastic commentary here, because we’re beyond help.

  3. menomama3 says:

    I find my replies to ignorant comments about race/adoption/family status or any number of social infractions is dependent on the situation and MY ability to cope with the idiots in the moment. Now that my children are older, their perceptions are different than when they were 4. I always replied/defended/retorted when they were little. Now I have to be more circumspect because they are likely to scold me for being a social boob.

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